The BUM Report is back with all your favorite oddities, unplanned results, and general statastical trivialities!  It's season 16 and the opening weekend was upon us with typical Olmecian fickleness.  You thought playing a road-80 lineup in the opening session would bring you good fortunes?  Wrong!  You thought you were throwing the Cup group match with a sub-60 lineup?  Wrong!  You thought maybe Olmec wouldn't be brutal enough to toss out a double-digit upset in the opening session?  Wrong again!  We're all about the things that are wronger here in this writer's workshop, so grab a frosty beverage of your choosing and delve into the wrongest depths the BUM Report can muster!

Session 1 always sees glaring differences in team ratings.  Some teams rest the intended starters for the season.  Some teams play them.  Some teams spread them out across all matches.  And some play home-away or conference-cup splits.  The end result is a mashup of the "tries" and "tries not" camps that leads to all sorts of Blowouts, Upsets and More!  We'll start with blowouts, where the top and not-so-top teams are highlighted.

In match 3, WGM Group play 1st round, we had a tie for Blowout #3.  Quincy (77) v Sheboygan (55).  The Bitey Ones tied for the 2nd-highest rating of the round, with only San Jose's 78 being higher.  The Bats put out the 3rd-lowest.  This made for a near-perfect recipe to give us a +35 sweep of the Bloodsuckers, and the Rabbids were consistent in winning by 11, 13, and 11 respectively to complete the #3 Blowout (tied).  That tied them with the 'Squatch, who also played a 77 in the opening round.  Their opponents were similarly woodland oriented, as the Flanned Fellsmen came to play.  Sort of.  Portland sent out a lineup rated at 44, absolute lowest of the entire session by 7 ratings points, and making the 33-ratings-points difference the highest of the session.  Though the 'Jacks played a respectable 2nd set (21-25) they only scored 9 in set 1, tying the lowest score of the session, and a 10 in set 3.  That stingy defense led Spokane to the +35 blowout, #3 (tied), so congrats to Al & Jason!

Match 1, Antioch (52) and Teutopolis (80).  Antioch tied the 2nd-lowest away rating of the week, and rolled into Twisterville where C-Ball had the winds cranked to category 3.  The +28 ratings difference was the 3rd-highest of the session.  Set 2 was the worst for the GlowGuppies, as they scored just 9 points, tying the low for the session.  T-Town let up a little in the other sets, and the resulting +40 blowout was good for #2 on the week, so congrats to C-Ball and bonus congrats for doing it to decades-long rival Rob!

And topping our blowouts, Rob used all that pend up frustration from match one and turned around to pour it into match 2.  Now at home, Antioch only put out a 66-rated team.  That was more than good enough to take down the lowest away-rated team of the session, N'Orleans (51), who apparently forgot the season was starting and was still playing practice squad scrimmage teams.  The Devil Fish were diabolical in their consistent attack, winning the three sets in similar 11-25, 12-25, 11-25 fashion on the way to a +41 Blowout of the Week!  Congrats to Rob for making waves in the #1 and #2 blowouts!

In the Upset department, things picked up in match 2.  Match 1 just had a single upset, minor at -2, though we appreciate Vick starting the season with one to make sure we'd have column fodder!  Match 2 picked up the pace.  Starting in SEC play, Starkville (68) traveled to Merritt Island (62).  At +6 rating, we would expect to see teams win by a comfortable 5+ points per set.  And that's what happened in sets 1 and 2, 25-19, 25-17.  And then the odd upset set happened at 20-25.  Blip in the program, as SEC power Houndtown would surely correct and track down a win in Pirate Cove.  Nope.  22-25 in set 4 and then Mark's Manatees would finish it off with their largest margin of victory, 6 points, in a 9-15 final set to claim the 5-set upset at -6!  Congrats to Mark and the Do-Ragged Dugongs for the #3 Upset!

Staying in match 2, and moving to Big East play.  For those familiar with this column, it is no surprise to see the Gargoyles perched high on the Upset Tower.  The Igneous Walltoppers have made an artform of taking down high flying teams, and this week was the Eagles' turn to take a rock to the head.  Conference-defending Alton traveled to Manitowoc, and their +8 rating was impressive on paper (74 v 66).  The match did not play out anywhere near expected.  The opening set was close.  Alton opened with a 2-0 lead, then gave it up and didn't lead for the rest of the match. They tied it back up at 18-18 before falling behind again, and held off 3 set points from 20-24 to 23-24 before Manitowoc finally got a kill to finish the set 23-25.  The Eagles seemed deflated at this point, never leading in set 2 as they fell 20-25.  Set 3 saw a better fight, leading at the 6-5 mark, and then things fell apart late as the Gargoyle's rolled multiple runs on the way to a final 19-25 set 3 as the Eagles' serve bounced out of bounds, and Manitowoc completed not just the #2 Upset of the Week, yet also our first Upset Sweep of the Season at -8!  Congrats, Derek, and it's clear that Olmec is not going to gift James a repeat title.

And topping the lows of the week, we go to the last match on the schedule: Match 3, WGM group play, St. Charles (57) and Burlington (67).  After exchanging early sets, with match 2 going to extra points before the BullyFrogs finished it off, we found ourselves with a match tied 2-2 and going to the final set.  This match was close despite the ratings difference everywhere except one category.  Hitting? .180 to .169, St. C.  Setting %: .424 to .432, Burlington edge.  Serving %: .819 to .822 Burlington, with 3 more aces.  Receiving % .920 to .953 Burlington, and an even 2.24 rating for both teams.  Digs were 41 to 42.  Blocks?  Yeah, about those blocks.  Clearly, being on poles and with long stick arms helped out the Scarecrows in ways the lowdown Frogs could only envy.  St. Charles had 34 blocks and 4 players at 6+.  Burlington had only 15 blocks and their guy (MB Lucarelli) only had 4.  That stat made the match difference as the 'Crows won set 5 15-12 and pulled off the #1 Upset of the Week at -10!  Congrats, Max!

In the More news of the week, we tip our hats to the league highs as well.  Best lineups so far?  Road ratings: 77 Ames.  79 Portland.  80 Pekin, Dallas & Nashville.

Home lines: 83 Portland. 84 Nashville, Quincy & Dallas.  86 Alton.

Neutral lines: 76 Denali & Merritt Island. 77 Quincy, Spokane & Teutopolis. 78 San Jose.

Highest scoring set?  Match 3, WGM group play, between Carlsbad and Nashville.  Set 2 went to 26-24 before Carlsbad pulled it out, and set 3 went higher still!  Final tally for the Firefoxes in their 4-set win came to 34-36, and easily topped our rankings as the only set to hit 30+ points.

Set 5s in extra points?  We had two!  Match 1, Merritt Island at Nashville.  Roy's team pulled out the 5-set win with a 14-16 final set.  That was tied in match 2, Albuquerque at Mat-Su.  The road team pulled out the 5-set win with a 5th set 16-14 score, and the match also featured our #2 highest set with set 3 going 27-29.

Highest scoring match?  222 total points, as Arlington and Cincinnati met in WGM group play.  This was a back and forth affair, with both the Vermilingua and Porkopolis taking a set in extra points, before the final 15-10 set 5 gave Arlington the narrow win.

Speaking of points, who seems to like them more than others?  When scoring points, Tucson is rationing theirs out this season, currently trailing the pack with only 182 total points scored.  On the defensive end, Spokane, fueled by an early blowout, has only given up 158 total points across their three matches.  When giving and receiving a plenty, it should perhaps come as no surprise that the red-and-white (Santa?) themed Firefoxes are leading both ends!  They have scored 312 total points.  They have given up 292.  Refusing to go down without a fight (or win by sweep!), Roy's Red Pandas played a 5-set and 2 4-set matches to kick off their XP-earning campaign, and with the most sets played also top the most points for and against.  Can they keep up this oddity?  We hope so, as it means the Rats would get some extra sets in every time we face them.

For a match of interest, our highest-rated match of the session was Match 1, BIG 8 play, Pekin (80) at Quincy (84).  What was Roger's reward for playing what tied the highest-rated road team of the session?  Nada.  They ran into a buzzsaw of buckteeth as the Rabid Biting Mules met them with the 2nd-highest home rating (tied).  While it was a run of close sets, each finishing 21-25 or 22-25, ultimately the Mules swept the Legume Legion to start the conference with a resounding win, while setting our season standard for highest-rated matches.  Congrats to Al, with thanks to Roger for the effort!

Having noted the match results, we now turn our focus to the predictive BUM powers for session 2 and beyond.  Who should you fear?  It's no surprise that your should fear the top 2 teams by T7 right now: Columbia (89.7) and Pekin (88.3).  Both finished the opening session 2-1 for records, and they also share another similar stat.  Each has their current T7 personnel all at +1 Fit!  The bonus for health in addition to top lines make them the teams to beat, while pulling off a winning record while doing it!  Steve and Roger continue to put the league on notice that the Big 8 is the top conference for now.  Other teams headed in the right direction for total power and tops in their respective conferences are: Cinci (Big East, 86.0, 5 +1 fit), Starkville (SEC, 85.1, 5 +1 fit) & Mat-Su (PAC 8, 84.6, 6 +1 fit).  Portland and St. Charles also have 6 of their T7 at +1 Fit and ready to roll for the season, furthering the Big 8's power gap over the rest of the league.  Sheboygan and Mendon have 5 players set at +1 fit, to give Cinci a push in the Big East matches.  For the rest of us, more need to step up their game to keep the bullies from running away with all the shiny things this season.

Best of fortunes in session 2, and if you fail to find it, may you fail so fabulously that you find your way into the BUM Report!